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Why Selling Isn't Always the Fastest Way to Clients

relationship marketing sales social selling Aug 21, 2021

When people come to me for help, they tell me they need more sales. What I usually discover is that they are either focusing too much on selling or they are not selling at all and not taking the right actions that lead to sales.

What Exactly is Selling?

Let's start by defining the word selling. A quick Google search revealed two definitions, and I would like to look at them both.

The first one defined selling as giving or handing over something in exchange for money. At its core, this is what selling is. This definition implies that someone has what some else wants and is willing to pay for. There is nothing pushy about this definition and it is a simple supply and demand example.

The second definition I came across was a little less friendly, in my opinion. The second definition states that selling is persuading someone of the merits of. When I read this one I cringed because this is how so many people see selling. This one implies that to sell means there is a lot of convincing and persuading, and that does not have to be true. And if you are seeing selling based on this second definition, then please read on.

Why Conversations Matter so Much Right Now

Building relationships and having conversations is the key to good marketing right now. Gone are the days when you create something and people will buy it. In today's competitive market, people want to know who they are buying from. They want to know you are the expert and you are the only one that is right for them. In order for them to come to this understanding, you must be in conversations with them!

Posting online and sending emails is great, but it is not enough. Data shows you now need to have an average of 16 touches with someone before they will buy from you. That means 16 pieces of communication - a blog, social media post, conversation, to email. I have even seen one top marketer say this number could be as many as 30 touches. That being said, getting into actual conversations is the fastest way to sales. 

Dropping links will not work and is not sustainable. Your potential clients want to know that you have a deep understanding of what they need before they will consider working with you. And you come to this understanding by having conversations with people who are your ideal clients.

Coffee Chats and Connection Calls are a Great Place to Start

The first thing I recommend to my clients is to get into more conversations. This can be accomplished by blocking out hours to meet with new people every week. 

This all usually starts in the DMs. And so many people get this part wrong, so listen up.

When you first meet people and are chatting in the DMs, you should NOT be selling and dropping links. Here's why: First, you have not yet uncovered their needs and QUALIFIED them. And second, they likely don't know you well enough yet, and if you sell too soon, you may lose them forever, so don't surprise them with a bait and switch by trying to sell too soon.

Instead, treat every new connection with respect and genuinely want to get to know them. 

The goals of your first call are NOT to sell, but the intention should be set that you want to learn more about them. The call also allows them to get to know you. And while you are on the call, I suggest helping them with a quick win. This shows then you can and will help them, and allows them to leave the call feeling supported. And because you have already helped them with something small, they will want more.

Some of my tips for the call are to show up at a high level. They will know if you are not. Ask them good questions that will help you to determine if they are the right fit and if you are the right fit for them. Engage and be genuine. 

If you determine they are a good fit and you have qualified them, ask for a second call to see how you can help them further. That way they will know that the next call is a sales call. It takes the pressure off of both of you if you know the purpose of the follow-up.

And if they are not the right fit, this could be the start of a great business relationship or joint venture partner. They will trust you and respect you because you did not try to sell to them when they are not the right client for you, and they could be a great referral partner. Nurture those business relationships. You never know who your most active supporters will be!

So, you see, slowing down your sales process can actually speed up your sales and improve your closing rate. When you take the time to get to know what people really want and if they are right for your program, you will only be selling to those who are the right fit, and your sales rate will improve. If it doesn't, you may need to get more clarity around who you sell to, what the challenges are, and your messaging. All of these things still do need to fall into place.

If you are not reaching your sales goals, I would love to chat. I have several ways to work with me that will help you gain the clarity you need, and finally, start getting the sales you always wanted. You can schedule a free 15-minute call to see if we are the right fit. I would love to help you reach your goals and beyond because my dream for all of my clients is for them to have a six-figure business and beyond and I have the tools to help you get there. Schedule a call here:

I help high-achieving coaches and service-based business owners become powerful CEOs, make more money, make a bigger impact, and scale on social. My clients not only grow their businesses, but they position themselves as leaders in their industry, scale, and hire profit-driven teams.  I offer 1:1 and group coaching programs. The best place to find me is in my free Facebook group: